What If They Hate Star Wars?

Oh my gosh...I'm panicking...what if my new little kiddos don't like Star Wars?  This just dawned on me...Josiah has action figures, we have all the movies (even the stupid Jar Jar ones).  My family quotes from them (nerdy, I know). My hubby preaches and references Yoda.  Yeah, it's that bad.  So...what if they don't like it?  What am I going to do?  I know, I'll bring action figures to China...I'll begin indoctrinating them IMMEDIATELY.  I wonder if they sell the movies with the characters speaking Mandarin.  That would be hilarious to watch!  That will be my shopping mission in China...forget the jade bracelets or the pearl market...I want to hear Vader go off on some rant in Chinese, and hear burnt-bacon Anakin say, "I hate you!" in Mandarin. As long as everything else is the same, (Vader's oxygen tank sounds for his crispified lungs...you know...heavy breathing) I'm game for it!! 

Still No Answer

For two and a half weeks I have heard NOTHING concerning my little girl's LOA. This week is a holiday in China, so my agency rep said I probably won't hear anything until Monday now. My travel month went from "guaranteed" November to December...and now January. I will NEVER think of the word "guarantee" the same way again! I am currently double the wait time that was "guaranteed" for my LOA. It was 60 days originally...I'm at 120. It is what it is. Some things in life do not have a guarantee on them. God never promised He would cater to our demands. He is not my personal genie that I order around. And while it is VERY difficult to watch others have a super fast adoption, with smooth sailing, I have to swallow my pride (and the lump in my throat) and congratulate them. There are several adoptive moms that I have gotten to know through this process and all of them have received their LOA's. And I still wait. And my son and daughter across the ocean still wait. Is it hard? Yes. But I keep myself busy so my mind doesn't have time to dwell on the negative. The Bible talks about "an appointed time"...there is an appointed time for my little boy and girl to meet us. It's just not today!! But it's soon! So in the mean time, I PRAY, I BELIEVE, and I SPEAK good things over them, over their lives, and over their futures...and I know that God is preparing THEIR hearts, just as much as He is preparing mine. Believe me, do not think for a MINUTE that I get depressed about this non-sense. I nipped that a while ago...I just won't have it...I HATE rotten, bad attitudes; a bad attitude never fixed anything or made time go faster. So if you're thinking of me today, don't think, "Oh, poor her." Give me a massive break, don't sulk for me...I'll probably be shopping and how can a person shop and be depressed at the same time? It's not humanly possible!!

Polar Bear Disorder

Yesterday my husband was reading something out loud and one of the words in this article said bi-polar disorder. Of course, Brianna doesn't know what that is so she heard it wrong and asked, "What is polar bear disorder?"  That's one of those cute things our kids say that we swear we're always going to remember.  Well, now I have a blog so I can ensure I never forget!  I'm looking forward to more of these moments with my little ones from China.  It seems like when they're young, those moments happen all the time...not so much when they're Josiah's age...he's the age where he thinks he knows everything and he's too cool to act like he doesn't!

Here's What My Daughter Learned in Children's Church

I know...just by the title you're on the edge of your seat with excitement, right? So, Brianna says to me, "Mom, how old are people when they start wearing diapers again?" "Huh? What are you talking about?" "Well, I'm wondering when people start to rot." Ok, this is a bizarre line of questioning coming from my 10 year old, even for Brianna.  She seems horrified so I begin to ask her why she's asking me these creepy questions. She begins to explain that in Children's Church they were learning about how the body eventually gives out and there is life after death. The children all have very vivid imaginations and began to ask questions (ahem...Brianna) and one thing led to another and now I have to explain to my daughter that not everyone over 60 is wearing a diaper, they are not currently rotting, and their eyes are not turning into ash...well, that I know of anyway. 

The Bigger Picture

Last night my family went to a fall party with hay rides, etc at our church. It was a ton of fun and I REALLY enjoyed myself, more than in previous years, for the mere fact that I stayed in doors almost the entire time...and I talked adoption...the entire time. I just freeze to death in anything under 72 degrees. Ok, I'm off topic...anyway, something in one of my adoption conversations hit me like a ton of bricks. We were discussing the adoption tax credit and how so many people NEED it, truly NEED it. And I was in the middle of speaking when I realized what I said...I DON'T need it...others do. Then I realized, maybe that's why I don't have my LOA yet. Is it possible there are a few others who desperately need that refund right away, and God is putting them ahead of me in line so they will be able to pay their bills, or maybe even be able to adopt again because of the refund?

 All of a sudden, I felt so selfish for begging God to get me to China by the end of the year. Do I still want to go in December? Yes, but not because of the money. I never even knew about the tax refund when I began the adoption process, and it won't effect us adopting again. If five or ten more families can adopt again because of this refund, by all means, they can go before me, I'll just travel in January, NO BIGGIE!! I never want to stand before God some day, and Him show me how I pouted while someone else received their LOA and they needed it more than me at the time. Believe me, I'm not trying to be Mother Teresa here, I'm just opening myself up to the possibility that there might be a bigger picture here. Adoption was never about me anyway. Refund or no refund, I have two adorable kiddos at the top of this page that WILL BE added to my family soon; they might just be joining us a little later than I had anticipated!